Going for what I wanted (even though it scared me)
It was May 2012 and I was in my last prerequisite class for the nursing program. The class was Microbiology and it was only the first week. Every time I walked through the school doors, I felt it in my gut–I do not want to do this.
I was reading a book at the time from Kelly Cutrone called “If You Have to Cry Go Outside and Other Things Your Mother Never Told You.” Kelly is one of those brutally honest no-bull kind of humans. She’s had a gnarly life.
Though night and day different in personality from me, her book inspired me. It said to something deep in me, “You can do anything. You don’t have to do this nursing thing if you don’t want to.”
It was in reading her book that I got the courage to have a conversation with my mom, who was a nurse herself.
I don’t want to do this anymore
The conversation went something like this “Mom, I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to be a nurse.” Her response is one I’ll never forget. “Paigey, I just want you to be happy. Do whatever that is.”
She believed in me. Her belief in me gave me a hope of “Maybe this is possible.” My next move was to call up a friend who was an entrepreneur and ask if I was crazy to quite pre-nursing school and pursue coaching–a career that at the time almost no one had heard of.
He said to me to do the thing that I could wake up every morning and do even if no one were paying me. For me, that was most certainly talking with the women who were not yet my clients. But they were reading my blog, sending messages and connecting with me on the internet. I wanted to work with them.
So I enrolled in Institute for Integrative Nutrition (IIN) and became a Certified Holistic Health Coach. I took my first client six-months later in December of 2012. The events that followed have formed what has been the best decade of my life, truly.
Thank you, younger self
Thank you, 20 year old Paige, for doing what scared you but lit you up. I remember at the time visualizing my future self:
She had a desk with client folders, a computer bag that she took to coffee shops and she took coaching calls from her office. She was fulfilled. Helping others, and so happy about it.
At the time, I had no idea how I was going to get there, but I was absolutely committed to the vision. I decided exactly this: “I don’t know how I’ll get there, but if I just keep going until I get there, I’ll eventually get there.”
That commitment was enough for me to believe that I could do it. If I just didn’t stop until I figured it out, I’d get to where I wanted to be.
Where I am today
Today, I have a career that I absolutely love. My coaching is lightyears ahead of where it was when I started and I’m so proud of that version of me who just started.
It all started with a vision and a commitment to the vision. Not a knowing how to do it all. Not getting a-million-and-ten certifications before I started. Just starting. Getting one certification and starting.
Yes, I’ve gotten other certifications along the way, but not as a way to procrastinate from taking clients. I began building my business first, and then added in a few more certifications once my business was up and thriving. Coaching clients is the most important part of this career.
Along the way I’ve added certifications such as: Certified Transformational Coaching Method Coach, Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor, and Ramsey Certified Financial Coach. Yes, I enjoy money coaching as well. The way we do one thing is the way we do everything and I see many similarities in the way we are with food and money.
Understanding my thoughts improved everything
In 2018, I began deepening my interest in learning about the way our thoughts affect our feelings and actions. And how the culmination of these things creates all of the results we want (or don’t want) in life. I began doing a ton more future self visualization, imagining the “me” I want to be, and making decisions ahead of time as if I were already her. Since then my growth has exponentially increased. I feel that I am consistently becoming the version of myself that I wanted to be, and the amount that this has increased my confidence and belief that anything is possible is astronomical.
Next, I switched the primary focus of my company from being one that focused on Intuitive Eating Coaching to one that focuses on becoming the woman you want to be, holistically. The woman you fall asleep at night dreaming of becoming, in all life areas. Sometimes you feel inspired to become her and other times you feel frustrated that you’re not yet “there”–I get that, I really do.
I am the version of myself I once wanted to be
Today I am the version of myself that two years ago I visualized myself becoming. I’d like to share a few details of what my two-years ago self saw when she pictured the me I’m living as today. Notice as you read even the small details count, because it’s all about embodying the visualization that you feel so connected to.
Here’s a list of things I have, do, or am:
- I have a home with white walls, tall white baseboards, and light wood floors and loads of natural light
- I get dressed in clothing that I love each day
- I do my hair–it is short, often curled and sometimes naturally wavy and feels very “me”
- My makeup routine is very simple–it’s timeless, quick to do, and feels very clean
- I work with like minded women who are inspired and energized to become the best version of themselves
- I am a mother who is attentive to her daughter and loves her. I don’t take things too seriously (or at least try not to), I laugh a lot, and have loads of fun (I love saying “yes” to fun every chance I get–fun is a value of mine!)
- I take great care of myself and my health, I have incredible boundaries and am unattached to my phone
- I love the Lord and favor His plans and His will above all else–I believe in goodness
- I lift up my husband, encourage him, and see the best in him (I get this “right” in the way I want to about 80% of the time, I’m always improving here)
- My nails are nice, clean, and often painted. I love the way this makes me feel
- I am interested in learning and listen to podcasts and books daily. Improving myself helps me inspire others. I have a commitment to not take in more information than I am willing to apply (I intentionally do not go into information overload)
- I create memories that feel great with my family and friends
- I love to travel (mostly locally), go to the beach, spend loads of time outdoors soaking up the sun
- I love to listen to music and often has it playing in the background at home
- I am generous and am a good friend who is willing to listen, encourage, and offer help whenever I can (and feel cheerful doing so)
- I have a business that is incredibly meaningful and creates a fulfilling experience not only for myself, but for each of my clients
I could go on. I know to some of you this list might sound incredibly specific. But in the visualization exercise I walk my clients through, this is how specific we get when I ask them to meet their future self. These were all things I once visualized but did not yet have. Now I live them.
What would be possible if you started now?
When doing this work of imagining your future self with my clients, once they’ve gotten the details and desires that she has (their future self), I have them use their imagination to ask their future self what encouragement she would give to them where they are today.
Every single time it’s to get started now. To stop waiting. The future them is so grateful that they decided to take their first steps today. This is exactly how I feel whenever I look back on past versions of myself. I’m so grateful I started–that I didn’t waste any time.
I will always regret time “wasted” but I will never regret taking steps, full of faith, before I feel 100% ready–that just leaves me feeling empowered and proud.
You can take your own steps today to become your future self by painting a clear picture of where you want to be (down to what you hair will look like!) and then showing up today as if you were already her.
Understanding who you want to be in the future helps you be present now
You might think that future self visualization takes you out of the present, but I have found the opposite to be true. When I can connect with who I want to be in the future, I am connecting to an evolved version of myself–the “me” I want to be. When I can get into the feeling and experience of being her it helps me to make choices as her now. For example, let’s say I see her having a super close and intimate relationship with her husband. One that is fun, full of encouragement for one another, and filled with laughter. I can take that information as showing me exactly how I want to show up today.
Today, I am settling into this version of me that I’ve been creating the last couple of years. I’m enjoying her immensely and I’m feeling into the next levels of myself again as I write this. It’s so fun to always be evolving because I love and appreciate myself in every stage. Living this way helps me to lean into and fully embrace the present every step of the way. It helps me to show up today, as my future self, instead of waiting for things to change in order for me to feel my best. I can feel good now, and so can you.
If you loved this post you might also enjoy:
- A free audio lesson I recorded for you all about making yourself a priority–listen here.
- The future self visualization meditation in Aligned Coaching (you can start working with me as your coach in Aligned today here).
- Listen to the first episode I ever recorded on the podcast that talks about living aligned with your future self here
Believe in the vision you have for yourself. You don’t have to know any of the “how” yet. Just paint the picture of where you want to be and commit to not stopping until you find your way there. If you want help, I’ll see you inside of Aligned Coaching (my group coaching membership site) where this is what we work on together every single day.
“Coaching with Paige is SUCH a blessing — I have literally been working on some of these areas for a decade but they didn’t click until I had this outlet for daily consistent practice and growth.” – Charlotte