Hey girlies! Happy Friday! I wasn’t sure if I was going to post today, but something in my health coaching sessions yesterday kept popping up, and I wanted to share it with you all… and that’s this:
When our inner rebel shows up and wants to just eat without a care (aka, let go of any thoughts that might control us)…
There must be something in which we’re holding on to, or have made a rule that is causing us to want to rebel or let go.
What things have I seen people turn into rules?
- “I can ONLY eat when I’m hungry. Therefore, if I go out to dinner with my boyfriend but am still not hungry from lunch, I can’t order anything.”
- “I should only eat HALF my plate. Therefore, I should only eat half of those raviolis I ordered even though I would like to enjoy more.”
- “Skittles are bad, so I should really try not to have them. I’m afraid that if I do I won’t ever stop and then I’ll be mad at myself because I’ll get fat.”
And what do all of these scenarios usually lead to?
- Eating when we’re not hungry anyway because we’re TIRED of the inconvenience eating ONLY when we’re hungry causes.
- Eating our whole dinner because, darn it, we want to! And then feeling guilty about it and wondering “Why do I continue to do this to myself?”
- Eating ALL of the Skittles because when we finally get them we want to hurry up and eat them before anyone (ourselves) takes them away from us.
Why? Because rebelling = compulsive or automatic behavior (acting FAST before we can even recognize what we’re doing)
Here’s the thing… If we have that burning itch to just let go and do what we want…
There is likely an underlying rule or belief there we’re holding on to as TRUTH and it would do us very well to notice (without judgement) what’s going on.
So, I want to encourage all of us today to check-in with ourselves and ask: “What is it that I would like to LET GO OF (in the moment) so that I can just do what I want?”
If this is hard to answer… Look at what you would LIKE to do. The rule is probably the opposite of the very thing that you would like.
Then, from THIS place of knowing what you would like, give yourself permission to do it!
The alternative is trying to keep it from yourself, and then chasing after it full force which leads to bingeing or eating 100 other things to try and make up for the food you’re trying to keep from yourself.
It’s so much better to give yourself PERMISSION to have what you want. It’s okay to want something.
Once we know we can have something, we can rest: “Ahhh, okay… this is good! I can have it..!”
My personal belief: “We can eat anything we want and still feel good.” (Unless we’re allergic of course)
To an extent, it’s not so much WHAT we eat, but HOW we’re eating it.
Important: The HOW cannot come from a place of “SHOULD or SHOULDN’T.”
Example: “I should only eat half of my burrito.” No no. That leads us to want to rebel and eat the whole thing (before we even notice).
Rather, the HOW needs to come from a place of WANTING to feel joy while we’re eating and when we walk away from the food, too.
The more flexible you are (versus rigid) the more you have the ability to determine the kind of experience you want to have.
Flexibility = choice = responding in helpful and satisfying ways
Rigidity = no choice = desire to rebel because NO ONE likes to not have choice
So, from the place of total permission, we can ask: “How would I most enjoy this?”
What are your food rules? Do you ever have the itch to just eat without thinking? What is it that you don’t want to think about?
If you relate to this post and would like support, health coaching is the perfect place for you. I’d LOVE to chat with you! Find a time that works to talk with me fo’ free here.